“A Comforting Circle”

Two families share why organ and tissue donation is the "never-ending gift."

By Kimberly Fox DeMeza

Linda Severn likes to quote a bumper sticker that reads, "Don't take your organs to heaven; heaven knows we need them here."

"Isn't that so profound?" says Severn. It is to her, since she is living a normal, dialysis-free life because one family made a weighty decision to allow their son's organs to be donated following a tragedy that took his life. "I'm living, breathing proof that transplants can work," she says.

It was during a routine gynecological procedure that Severn discovered she had polycystic kidney disease, a genetic condition that would lead to dialysis and, eventually, the need for a kidney transplant. In November 1993, the disease took over her kidney function. She went from a seminormal life to one that required complicated dialysis, three times a day for 45- to 60-minute sessions, while also managing a full-time job.

In April 1994, Severn's physicians determined that her kidney was functioning at only 20 percent, and placed her on the national waiting list for a kidney transplant. However, her wait was not long. In January 1995, she received a kidney from a 19-year-old man from Stewartsville who'd been in a fatal car accident. Several other people also received an extension of life from this young man.

A DONOR'S STORY

Bunny Hancock lost her son Matt, a vibrant 22-year-old journalism student at Virginia Tech, to a brain aneurysm. "Death, regardless of the circumstances, is difficult for any loved one to deal with,” says Hancock. “Sudden death is even more difficult.

"I would probably be in deep therapy if Matt had not been a donor," she explains. Because she had made her own personal decision years earlier to be an organ donor, when the physicians explained that Matt could be a donor, she did not hesitate. "I said, ‘Yes, he will be.’ We're a donor family. If there is an option to save a life or make a life better, I see absolutely no reason to bury or cremate organs and tissues that can be used. Organ donation works. It is no longer a miracle," she says.

A TIME TO HEAL

Some transplant recipients, like Severn, are so grateful to donor families that they often request to meet them so they can thank them for their decision, and learn more about the person whose loss of life gave life to so many others. It can be part of a healing process that works both ways. Recipients can work through the dark thought that someone had to die in order for them to live. Donor families can cope with their devastating loss by seeing that a life goes on. It's a comforting circle that is often complete, whether or not the two ever meet.

In Severn's situation, she was fortunate enough to meet the young man's family, as well as two other people who received his organs. "That unusual meeting was so wonderful. It was like an extended family," she explains.

Years after Matt Hancock's death, his mother met the man who received her son's heart. Bunny learned that the recipient, Blacksburg resident Clinton Johnson, had not only gained new life, but he was also inspired to write a book about his spiritual journey. Johnson dedicated his book In Search of the Kingdom to Matt's memory and included Matt's photograph and one of Matt’s original poems. "Matt finally got published," says Bunny.

Many donor families, as well as recipients, also find talking about their experiences with others helps them through the grief process. Severn jumped right into volunteering for LifeNet, and is also the president of an area support group for transplant recipients.

While Bunny Hancock already devoted a lot of her spare time to volunteer efforts with nonprofit agencies like the Juvenile Diabetes Foundation, she now focuses on LifeNet and educating people about organ and tissue donation. "I think the reason for Matt's death — if there is one — is to educate. People need to know that donation is part of life planning, and the best time to talk about this is when families come together in happy times. If you plan now when you're healthy, the decision is made for you in the tough times," she says.

Hancock, who's been employed in the admissions office of the National College of Business and Technology for the past 10 years, also believes businesses have a responsibility to educate their employees. "Organ and tissue donation should be included in health benefits information. I'm one of many LifeNet volunteers who can go out and speak to businesses," she says. As a budding journalist, Matt would've agreed that his mother's role in "getting the word out" is the right thing to do. Intuitively, she knows this and says with pride, "He is up there right now, organizing the whole thing."

Do Your Part!

To be an organ and tissue donor, the most important thing you can do in Virginia is document your wish at save7lives.org. This Website works in conjunction with the DMV system and allows you to sign up on-line as an organ and tissue donor. The process is simple, quick, and secure.

Your decision at save7lives.org will be honored. Family permission is no longer required in the state, except in the case of a minor.

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